What’s Stopping You?

January 5, 2011

“Go! What’s stopping you?” is the slogan used by a major airline here in the U.S.  While this question is written to inspire people to fly with their particular company, it provides good food for thought for us all.

What’s stopping you from living the life you know you could be living?  What keeps you from chasing (and catching) your dreams?

Fear of failure?

Lack of belief in yourself?

The poor economy?

Most of us could legitimately claim at least one reason for not whole-heartedly pursuing our dreams, but if we allow those things to hold us back, we will eventually be left with nothing but a long list of “what could have been.”

As the airline motto implies, it’s time to leave all excuses behind and start moving forward in the direction of your dreams. Start now!   Instead of focusing on the reasons why you can’t, make a list of all the reasons you should and can, and redirect your thoughts toward those instead.

At first, this may take some conscious effort on your part, but aren’t your dreams worth it?

STOP complaining and rationalizing away your success.

GO in the direction of your dreams!

And don’t give up until you see those dreams come true!

God Bless!

Coach Becky J. Taylor

Bold New Day! LLC

Personal Development Coaching for Women

http://www.boldnewday.com

Follow Your Passion!  Pursue Your Purpose!

Become the Person You Know You Were Born to Be!

 

Coach Becky J. Taylor (Bold New Day! LLC) specializes in Personal Development Coaching for Women, based on Christian principles. She is available  for personal coaching, group coaching, face to face or phone coaching sessions, speaking engagements, women’s events, and workshops anywhere in the continental United States. http://www.boldnewday.com

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How Not to Fail in 2011!

December 27, 2010

It’s that time of year again!  Time to think about the New Year and make those dreaded resolutions everyone talks so much about.

Statistics indicate that most resolutions get dropped within a few weeks of being set.  In other words, the odds appear to be stacked against you from the get-go.

Well, let me assure you, that doesn’t have to be the case!  You and your resolutions can be the exception to this unwritten rule.

“How?”

I’m glad you asked!

Here are a few tips to help you succeed in 2011!

1. Keep It Real (But Dream Big!)

Often the reason we fail to meet our goals is that we set them too high.  Our plans look great on paper, but in reality they just don’t work.  It’s easy to become overwhelmed if your goal is realistically unattainable. I believe this is the reason most people drop their resolutions so quickly.  They look at that big mountain of goals they’ve built for themselves … and feel inadequate to conquer it, so they don’t really even try.

Now, I am the last person on earth who will tell you something can’t be done.  Those who know me at all, also know I insist on reaching for the stars … and have every intention of grasping them!  However, reaching some goals takes longer than others. For example, you may want to lose 150 lbs but it might be nearly impossible (not to mention physically unhealthy) for you to lose that much in one year.

Instead of saying “I want to lose 150 lbs in 2011”, say “I want to lose 150 lbs and I will begin by losing 1-2 lbs a week in 2011.”

That doesn’t sound nearly as overwhelming as losing 150 lbs, now does it?

2. Prioritize!

How badly do you want to reach your goals?  Which ones are most important to you?  Sit down and brainstorm.  List everything you want to do/change in the coming year.  Spend some time thinking about everything on your list.  What is most pressing? Which items matter the most in the scheme of things?  Most importantly, “Why do you want to reach each particular goal?Inspiration is critical.  If you don’t have a good “why?” you may not stay motivated enough to push through.

Narrow your list down to no more than five or six goals for the New Year.

3. Be specific!

Say, “I will lose 1-2 lbs a week in 2011”   (I’m using weight loss as an example because that is one of the most common resolutions.)  Apply this approach to each goal on your list.

4. Make a plan!

Don’t just say you will, decide how you will!  Write your plan down and implement it.

“I will  join the gym.”

“I will hire a personal trainer.”

“I will throw all the unhealthy food in my pantry away and replace it with more healthy choices.”

or even, “I will talk to the doctor about weight loss surgery.”

You can wish, hope, and dream as much as you want, but without putting action behind those wishes, hopes, and dreams, chances are nothing will change!

5. Make a friend!

Connect with others who share similar goals. Any task will be made much simpler when you have someone to talk too, laugh with, cry with and of course celebrate with!  Remember, friendship is a two way street … be ready and willing to offer the same support to your friends!

6. Be accountable!

Accountability is key!  Your friend can be very helpful in this area, but you might also want to consider hiring a professional coach to help hold you accountable. You’ll be much more likely to stay focused if you know someone else is going to be keeping track of what you do (or do not) accomplish each week.

7. Be Committed!

Commit to your resolutions!  Focus on them every day.  Don’t give in to temptations to toss them aside.  If you slip and fall, don’t stay down!  Don’t kick yourself in the pants for “failing.” Get back up and start over again … and again … and again if you must!

The only way to fail is to stop trying!

I hope this article encourages you today, and in the days to come.  Here’s to your very successful 2011, from “Bold New Day! LLC”

Be blessed!

Coach Becky J. Taylor

Bold New Day! LLC

Personal Development Coaching for Women

http://www.boldnewday.com

Follow Your Passion!  Pursue Your Purpose!

Become the Person You Know You Were Born to Be!

Coach Becky J. Taylor specializes in Personal Development Coaching for Women, based on Christian principles. She is available for personal coaching, group coaching, face to face or phone coaching sessions, speaking engagements, women’s events, and workshops. http://www.boldnewday.com

 

Brown ChairAnd old brown leather chair and it’s matching ottoman occupy one corner of our keeping room.  The chair has never been among my favorite pieces of furniture.  It’s just too big and bulky to suit my decorating preferences.  In truth, no one usually even sits in the chair at all unless we happen to have company.  Surprisingly enough, most of our visitors actually like the chair and have commented on it’s comfort.

More often than not, I use the chair for another purpose altogether.  Over the years it has become a laundry center where I sort, fold and store our clothing fresh from the dryer.  I’m almost ashamed to admit that approximately four days out of each week, the chair is buried in stacks of clothing awaiting transfer to their proper destinations.  Because I use the chair to hold the laundry, it is rendered unavailable for it’s intended purpose, which is of course to be a place for people to sit!

The chair functions just fine as a laundry center and I suppose I could continue using it in that manner forever.  It really is a waste of a good piece of furniture though.  A plain old $5.00  plastic laundry basket would be a much more practical and useful container for our clothing.

Some people live their entire lives in much the same way.  They were created for something specific, yet they clutter their souls and surroundings with so many other things that their original purpose stays hidden, or even worse, lost altogether.

Unlike a piece of furniture, which has no knowledge of why it is on the earth, people tend to be unsatisfied unless they are doing what they were meant to do.  They may function just fine in whatever ulterior role they choose , but most of the time they will have a nagging feeling, a sense of restlessness that tells them something is amiss.  They will not be fully content until they are walking in the calling for which they were born.

God  has a purpose for your life.  The Bible says He knew you before you were formed in your mother’s womb.  He created you and placed your spirit in a human body for a specific purpose.  A purpose so unique that no one else can fulfill it!

Now that should make you feel pretty special!  The Creator of the universe not only knows who you are, He has a specific plan for you! (Oh! And according to Jeremiah 29:11-13, that plan is for your good!)

Of course, it’s up to you to decide whether or not you will carry out your true purpose, and God loves you no matter what you choose.   But imagine how He must feel when He see His children being less than He designed them to be!

Are you sincerely happy with the way you are living, or are you merely functioning day to day?  Are you doing what you believe you should do, or are you simply doing what’s easiest or most convenient?  Does the idea of pursuing your true calling seem like too much “work”?   Following the path you were meant to follow may not necessarily be easy, but the rewards are so much worth the effort!

It’s not too late!  Take that first step in the right direction today!

Follow your Passion!  Pursue your Purpose!

Become the Person You Know You Were Born To Be!

Philip, enjoying the big brown chair as it was meant to be used!

Philip, enjoying the big brown chair as it was meant to be used!

Becky J. Taylor

http://www.boldnewday.com

It’s that time of year again!

… the time when people start thinking about New Years resolutions.  The most common resolutions people make, pertain to weight loss and personal fitness goals, career or financial goals, and relationship goals.

Although these are almost always written with the best of intentions, the vast majority of people never see their resolutions through to completion.  More often than not, by the first week of February, new plans fall by the wayside and old habits creep back in.

Perhaps you can relate.

It’s sad that so many fall short of realizing their dreams.   Rest assured!  If God has placed a dream in your heart, He has also placed within you, the ability to make that dream come true.  The key to success is to access that ability and put it to proper use.

This is where a Life Coach can be of great value.

What is a Life Coach?

I get this question a lot.  It can be a bit tricky to explain exactly “what” a Life Coach is and how an individual might benefit from hiring one.

Life Coaches are often thought of as Consultants or Counselors, but they are neither.  Life Coaching is an entity all it’s own with almost as many unique niches, or areas of expertise, as there are people who seek Life Coaching Services.

“Life Coach” is a term used to describe a professional who helps clients determine and achieve personal goals.   In my opinion, this simplistic definition doesn’t do justice to the valuable service Life Coaching provides.

What Can A Life Coach Do For You?

I believe a Life Coach can best be compared to a Personal Trainer. I came to this conclusion a few weeks ago when our family joined a fitness club.   Before I went to the gym for the first time, I set the general goal of making improvements in my physical condition.  Unfortunately, that’s as far as I’d managed to plan.  I didn’t have a clue about how to reach my goal and found myself immediately overwhelmed by the vast array of exercise equipment in front of me.

Thank God for the Personal Trainer who stepped in and helped me gain focus.  The trainer asked a few questions about what I hoped to achieve over the coming months, and within minutes he’d helped me take the first few steps toward that end.

Not only did he get me started, the Personal Trainer is keeping me accountable for sticking to my plan for success.   It didn’t take me long to want to stop my workout the first time I attempted it.  The trainer however, made quitting seem like less of an option. Knowing he’s going to be observing the results of my actions (or lack thereof) makes it much less likely I’ll cheat on the program.

Most important of all, the trainer helped me see that I can keep going long after my body and self-confidence starts screaming for me to quit.  Because of the trainer, I have a new found sense of accomplishment.  I now realize I am capable of doing far more than I first believed.  My goal suddenly seems more of a real possibility than a mere desire.

Like a Personal Trainer, A Life Coach helps clients focus on his/her personal goals and find ways to reach them.  They encourage their clients to stretch beyond their self imposed limitations in order to succeed.

What Can’t A Life Coach Do For You?

There’s only so much any one person can do for another. Just as I won’t benefit physically if I sit and watch the trainer do all the push ups, squats and aerobic exercise I should be doing,  neither will a client gain anything from a Life Coach who doesn’t encourage them to do their own work, drawing  from their own potential.

Where is Your Life Coach?

Life Coaching is better understood through experience, than by verbal definition.  One way to find your Life Coach is to participate in free sample sessions almost all Life  Coaches offer to prospective clients.   A quick Google search will reveal a variety of Life Coaches available to assist you.  Browse several of their websites and choose a handful to call for sample sessions.   Keep in mind that most coaching sessions can be done over the telephone, so there’s no reason to limit yourself to the Life Coaches located only in your city.

However large, or far away your goals may seem, you can reach them!  There is a Life Coach available, who is perfectly suited to help you in your journey.

God Bless!

Coach Becky J. Taylor

CTA Certified Life Coach

Bold New Day!

http://www.boldnewday.com


Sweet Success!

November 18, 2009

What does “success” mean to you?

Sadly, I find many people are determined to compare themselves to others in their definition of the term.  To some, “success” involves a seven-figure yearly income, nice cars and a big house.  Many tend to feel like they’ve failed themselves and society if they are unable to keep up with the proverbial “Jones ‘”.

(Not that I find anything wrong with having a seven-figure income, nice cars and big houses.)

My question would be, what good is a seven-figure income and all those other great things, if you don’t feel satisfied that you are doing what you were meant to do with your life?

You were put on this earth with a purpose to fulfill.  Maybe your purpose is to make a lot  of money so you can share your blessings with others, or maybe it is to live simply, foregoing all those things society has labeled as indicators of “success”,  and go instead to the mission field to dig wells for thirsty people.

The truth is, there are as many ways to be successful as there are people on this earth. No one else can judge your level of success. Only you and God can determine that.

So I’ll ask again, What does success mean to you?  Are you striving toward what you feel is truly important, or are you struggling to fulfill someone else’s expectations for your life?  Chances are, if you’re feeling empty despite your best efforts to succeed, you’re reaching for the wrong goals.  If you don’t feel a spark of passion when you think about your work, you’re probably not in the field to which you’ve been called.

As this year is quickly drawing to a close, think about your personal definition of success (not one that’s been fed to you by society.)   Are you on the right track?  Do you feel good about what you’re doing with your life?

If you feel called to be a mother and a housewife,  be the best mother and housewife you can be!  You will be a success!

If you know you were placed on this earth to be a great scientist and find cures for deadly diseases, then pursue that field with all your might!  You will be a success!

No matter what you know you are meant to do, do it with passion and enthusiasm.   Do it without regard to what others may think.  Do it without comparing yourself to any one else.

Simply pursue the passion God has placed in your heart, and you cannot … will not, fail.

To your success!

Becky J. Taylor

Certified Personal Life Coach

Bold New Day! LLC

http://www.boldnewday.com

Stress Stoppers

November 3, 2009

Stress Stoppers

(The first in a series of stress minimizing techniques.)

1.Lose the Red Cape!

Admit it, you’re not “Wonder Woman.”  The sooner you can accept this fact, the better off you’ll be.  As badly as you might want , you can’t do it “all” by yourself. Humble yourself and ask for help!  You may be surprised to learn how much assistance is available to you.

Tip: Start at home. Believe it or not, your husband may not realize the growing pile of dirty socks in the bedroom floor is adding to your stress.  Tell him, then ask  if he’d mind picking them up regularly.  (You’ll never know until you try!)  Likewise, your school age children are perfectly capable of performing small, yet time consuming chores such as feeding and watering the pets.  Make those things their “job”.  It will boost their self esteem, and you’ll have fewer things to tend to in the morning.

If all else fails, pay someone else to come in and clean your house.  If you can’t afford to pay someone, try  bartering for services with a friend or neighbor.

2. Keep a Journal.

Make a practice of writing your thoughts down.  This can be beneficial in a several ways.  Writing about your situation can help get problems off your chest without hurting anyone in the process. In other words, it’s a safe, effective way to vent!

Having your thoughts on paper can also help put them in perspective.  Things may not be as bad as they seem once you see them in black and white.

Writing your feelings out also allows you to spend a short time actually focusing on your problems and gives you the opportunity to close them up and “put them away” for a while.

Tip:  An expensive, decorative Journal is nice but not necessary.  An inexpensive notebook purchased at the dollar store works just as well.  Keep one in your purse, or desk for easy access just in case you feel a “vent” coming on in the middle of the day!

3. An Apple A Day… Is Not Enough!

Don’t skip meals, especially breakfast! Have you noticed when you start the day off with a do-nut, you feel hungry again just a short time later?  Making poor food choices in the morning also makes it more difficult to make good choices throughout the rest of the day.

When you’re under stress, your body produces cortisol which actually causes you to crave foods that are high in fat, sugar and salt. This only adds to the problem. Resist the urge to gobble down sugary foods and caffeinated beverages on your way out the door.

Tip: If you tend to be in a rush in the mornings, it will help to keep some hard boiled eggs and orange juice in the fridge.  Reach for those for a healthy quick breakfast instead of sugary snacks and caffeine.  Eggs are rich in protein, and orange juice will give your blood sugar the lasting boost it needs to get through the first part of the day .

4. Laugh It Off!

Anyone can laugh. It doesn’t cost a dime and has absolutely no negative side effects! Studies have shown that laughing decreases the hormones that cause changes in the blood vessels responsible for elevation in blood pressure. The stress hormone,cortisol is also responsible for lowering levels of immunity. Laughing decreases your stress hormone levels and therefore increases your resistance to disease!

You may be surprised to learn that laughing works even when there’s nothing particularly amusing going on.  Throwing your head back and “faking” a good belly laugh will have the same physical effect as laughter that’s been induced by something humorous.

Tip: Do an internet search for some funny videos or jokes and keep them handy for quick reference whenever you realize you could us a good laugh. If nothing else, fake it for the same effect!

5.  Good Night, Sleep Tight!

Sleeping is not negotiable. You must have it!

When your body doesn’t get enough sleep, it goes into a state of stress. The body’s functions are put on high alert which causes an increase in blood pressure and a production of the stress hormone,cortisol. Higher blood pressure increases your risk for heart attacks and strokes.

You get the picture, don’t you? Sleep is imperative to your overall emotional and physical health.  Stress may cause you not to sleep, and not sleeping increases your stress level!  Break the cycle by making it a point to get the rest you need.

Tip: Create a relaxing bedtime routine.  Take a warm bath. Listen to soothing music. Write in your journal.  Pray. Meditate. Do whatever makes you relax so you can fall asleep.

Avoid heavy meals,caffeinated beverages and exercise during the hours just before bedtime.  All these things can interfere with sleep.

Until next time!

Becky J. Taylor

Bold New Day! Life/Success Coaching for Women

http://www.boldnewday.com

11-3-09

What is stress? I’m glad you asked!

According to dictionary.com , stress is:

“A specific response by the body to a stimulus, as fear or pain, that disturbs or interferes with the normal physiological equilibrium of an organism.”  

or “physical, mental, or emotional strain or tension”

Of all the definitions listed, I think this one sums it up best: 

Stress is “the physical pressure, pull, or other force exerted on one thing by another; strain.”

This definition probably refers more to stress on tangible items, like crowbars against automobile rims, but I believe it also applies to the way stress feels to us.  If you’ve ever experienced stress (and if you’re old enough to read this, it’s safe to say you have) you’ll definitely identify with that feeling of  “force” being exerted on you by something, or someone in your life. 

Stress comes in different forms and as humans, we’ve developed many individual methods of dealing with it.  Some of us more successfully than others.  If you happen to fall into the “less successful” group, take heart!  You can learn to identify and conquer the stress in your life and even put it to work for you!

In order to understand effective methods of dealing with it, it’s helpful first, to identify the different types of stress one might encounter.

Consider these categories:

Shoo Fly!

This is “everyday” stress.   Everyone experiences it.  It’s the stress you feel when you’re late for an appointment because you got stuck in traffic.   It’s the familiar feeling of having too much to do and too little time in which to get it done. It can start in the morning when your feet hit the floor and last until you turn off the light that night. It’s that force that constantly presses on you during the day from all kinds of people and circumstances.  Like a fly that keeps circling you at dinner, “Shoo-fly” stress consists of all the minor annoyances that plague us on a daily basis.

Cute Kitten:

This stress is actually good in nature, yet it requires something out of the ordinary from you, therefore force comes into the picture.  It might be a much desired move to a new house, your wedding day, or a brand new baby in your family.  We look forward to these happy occasions, but they all require action from us above and beyond our normal routine and are therefore stressful. 

Little Foxes:

This type of stress is a bit more serious and tends to require more of our attention.  It’s the kind of stress that happens when your plans are upset by an unexpected event that suddenly takes priority.  Your child gets sick at school and has to be picked up, despite the fact you’ve got three appointments scheduled that afternoon.  If you cancel your appointments, it could have long term effects on your business.  Or say, you get caught speeding and have to explain to the nice officer exactly why you were going 75 m.p.h in a 60 m.p.h. zone.  The officer might invite you to visit the judge and tell him your story instead.  Whether in the form of looming deadlines or impending court dates,  this kind of stress is capable of  keeping you awake at night. 

Wolves At The Door:

This stress is relentless and you probably feel like you don’t have much control over it.   It wears on you for long periods of time, and keeps you constantly aware of its presence. Overdue bills combined with inadequate finances, as well as unhealthy long term relationships, all cause this kind of stress.  The effects of this stress carry over to other areas of your life and can leave some pretty serious damage in it’s wake.  Many consider this the worst kind of stress simply due to the nature of the beast.  It might not be any fault of yours that it’s landed on your doorstep, yet you are helpless to make it go away.

Shark Attack:

This stress is traumatic and can have a permanent negative impact.  “Shark attack” stress leaves you emotionally disabled.  Situations  like the unexpected death of a loved one,  suffering horrible abuse at someone else’s hands, or losing your home in a fire are a few examples.  While it isn’t quite as common as the other forms of stress, it isn’t something that can be ignored.  The majority of us will encounter this serious form of stress at one time or another.  Most often, victims of this stress need professional help to reach a satisfactory recovery.

So, there you have it!  Stress is “a physical pressure, pull or other  force exerted” on one thing (you!) by another (person or situation.)

Stress is inevitable.  As long as we have breath in our body, we will have stress.  The good news is this; there are many methods of minimizing the negative effects of stress.

We’ll cover that next time!

God Bless!

Becky J. Taylor

CTA Certified Life Coach

http://www.boldnewday.com

Sept. 28, 2009